Friday, 22 May 2009

Hell Yeah!

Right now it is 12:48 in the afternoon.

So far today I have had half a bottle of water (I know, I know, I need to drink more =/) and a piece of sugarfree gum.

Only just now starting to feel hungry but I'm savoring the feeling =]

If I had the stuff at home I'd be having Braised Lettuce tonight, but I don't, and I'm not going to Tesco because I don't have the energy or the will. So no idea what I have at home. Maybe a fat free 100-kcal yogurt? Hmm, I might have some low-calorie Chicken Noodle Soup, actually.. I think it said it's 35kcals per serving? Mmmm.

So yeah, so far so good. And in just over 4 hours I'm home free!

Meeting my friend for sushi tomorrow, but if that's all I eat tomorrow it shouldn't be too bad. Yo! Sushi has nutritional info up at their website, so I'm going to try to stick to the best options and fill up on green tea (unlimited!). The dishes come with two of whatever type of sushi it is and we're sharing, so I will be able to have some variety without pigging out on eighty pieces.

The downside is that after doing some shopping, S's fiancee L is meeting up with us to chill, chat, catch up. And we're meeting him at Starbucks. Now, I LOVE starbucks. And I'm in the mood for a caramel coffee light frappuccinno. BUT! I don't need the extra calories on top of sushi.

Do I have the will power to get a plain small coffee, no milk and with some splenda sweeteners in it?

Funny how I can often say no to food, but not to Starbucks. You are my weakness!

Tonight is going to be busy, since I need to find somewhere to put my aunts' laundry to dry (I thought it would be bad form just to wash my own stuff and leave theirs in the laundry basket for when they got back haha) and vacuum the entire house, including the stairs, which is precarious business if you're like me and have a tendency to fall down them stone sober and barefoot, nevermind trying to balance a fucking vacuum on there. Actually, come to think, there's not that much else I need to do, aside from wipe down the kitchen counters and get rid of some out of date food (why would my aunt feed her dog half a can of dog food and then leave it in the fridge knowing full well that the dog is going away for two weeks and that shit is going to stink?)

I also need to bake... I told my aunt about what me and S made last week (and which I wound up giving to my neighbour =]) and she wants some so I'll have to do that tonight so they can have some when they get home.

It used to piss me off when I made cookies before. Because I used to bake a huge batch of like 9 dozen cookies, take a dozen to work, eat half a dozen, and by the end of the week, if I went for a cookie, there would be none left. How do they eat 7 and a half dozen cookies to themselves? I'll tell you how. Rather than eating a cookie as a snack or a couple for dessert or a treat or something, my aunt would eat 7 cookies for breakfast. She'd have 5 cookies before bed. Wake up in the middle of the night and have another half dozen just because she felt like it. I swear to god one time two dozen cookies disappeared literally overnight - there were a lot left when I went to bed, and I went to grab a couple to take to work with lunch, and there were none. And the last two batches of banana bread I made, I got none of.

Anyway. My point is, that doesn't piss me off anymore. Now, I'm grateful for it. I love baking, it can be kind of therapeutic and stress-relieving for me. But the problem is what to do with the results. I was lucky last week that I was throwing some stuff out into our garbage bin while my neighbour's kid was playing in his backyard so I could hand over the cupcakes and blondies then. I wouldn't just wander over and knock on their door to give them, because I'm kind of dumb but whatever.

Instead, leave it on the counter and it'll be gone in two days and I don't have to face it everyday and feel bad for wasting ingredients and money =]

What does irritate me though is that if my aunts make a group meal it's often a matter that we all pay for it. My aunt's partner makes this amazing dish that I love and have had twice in the 5 years since I moved here. And two years ago when I asked if she'd make it, she told me "sure if you buy the ingredients." However, when I bake, when I'm ASKED to bake (my aunt is constantly asking me for oatmeal raisin cookies, peanut butter cookies, and banana bread), it's out of my own pocket. And I can't really afford to be buying a ton of baking ingredients just because. Sigh.

It's going to be a bit of a problem after they have their surgery. Good and bad. Good because there won't be their crappy food in the house to tempt me. Bad because I won't be able to bake and palm the results off on them. It's a pain in the ass to bring stuff into work on the bus but that's what I'll have to do - I love to bake and have no plans to stop doing it.

Anyway, this doesn't really have a point haha. 4 hours to go, it's now 1:01pm =]



Bailey said...

I really admire how strong you are. Any kind of baked good, especially oatmeal raisin or banana bread would either get me binging or crying because I wanted to binge. You make me feel stronger, thank you.

Ana said...

Ugh, if there are cookies in front my me I eat them like your aunt would. Fortunately, I'm good at not buying them, and my mom rarely bakes. lol :P Good luck.