008.2: Cutting Through Just Like Champagne Petals

I can’t concentrate on anything. I’ve literally been sat here staring at nothing for a while. I have three more pieces of work to do and I might blitz them out of the way and drop them later so I can chill for a while this afternoon, and it still looks like I’ve done work steadily all afternoon.

I hate being sick. My energy reserves are tenuous at the best of times, and right now I feel entirely wiped. And, if possible, I feel worse now than when I woke up this morning. My throat hurts all the time now, instead of just while moving, talking, swallowing or god forbid yawning. I can feel the swollen gland on the left side throbbing constantly. My inner ear canals are sore and they itch, and the itching is driving me crazy. I’m starting to feel sick just from the mucous in my nose and possibly chest. My green tea is giving me heartburn. Well no, it’s not really the green tea, but the water in our drink machines always gives me acid for some reason. Don’t ask, because I have no idea how either.

The good side to all of this is that I’m nowhere near hungry. The thought of eating doesn’t make my mouth water and my stomach tingle in anticipation as it once would have. Right now, the thought of eating revolts me. The lady next to me at work has just opened a cheese and onion sandwich, and the smell of it is making me feel nauseous. My head is spinning. I feel tremendously horrible.

All I want to do right now is go home, run a steaming hot bath and lay in it for an hour, and then go straight to bed. Unfortunately, I know this isn’t going to happen.

I ran into my manager when she was coming out of the bathroom at the end of our wing and she asked how I was doing, then immediately frowned and said “Not good huh?” So I told her about the sinuses and the horrificness and the glands. (incidentally: Glandular is an awesome word) She told me if it’s still bad tomorrow to go to the doctor. So at least I know she’s understanding if I do wind up calling in sick tomorrow. I really don’t want to, but we’ll see how tonight goes, how I feel when my alarm wakes me at 7 tomorrow morning.

Once again though, I’d rather wait until after I’ve had my review to go off sick. Or not go off sick at all.

I might need to see my doctor anyway, though. I called for a repeat prescription of my BCP, and the receptionist woman told me it’s not on my repeat prescription list. She said the doctor had taken it off but hadn’t left any notes. So she’s requested it, but I have to wait until it goes to my doctor to be printed and signed to see whether or not I can get it. She said the doctor might need to see me – I know they’re supposed to be monitoring my blood pressure while I’m on this pill, and the last time my doctor took my blood pressure was probably over a year ago. So I have to wait for the doctor to call to set up an appointment, or pick up the prescription on Friday. Or, get someone else to, since I’m supposed to be working 8:30-5 on Friday. I gave the receptionist my mobile number, since the number they have on file for me is my grandmother’s home number, and I haven’t lived there in eight months. Granny would pass on the note but I’d rather just talk to them myself instead of messing around and having to call back to try to get an appointment that is less than three weeks from now. I only have a week and a half’s worth of pills left.

Sorry, I’m just rambling on and on and on, but I felt like I needed to do something other than sit and stare at a blank computer screen for an hour.